Inktober 2025 - 1 - Mustache / Moustache

Despite his name, Emmet Von Batchky was not a nobleman. His family had once been noble indeed, but the title had been stupidly lost in a poker game one night, long before he was born. His ancestors had however kept handing down the particle in their surname to their descendants anyway; it was not what had interested the poker player that night, after all.

Emmet did not resent that careless forefather for his negligence. He had no particular desire to be anything more than he was. Other than this silly misadventure, all members of his family had done quite well for themselves, even without officially being part of some so-called high society, and his parents were no different. He was born to Emma and Tybalt Von Batchky, both with respectable professions, and who raised him with a strong enough work ethic so that he would eventually be in a position to boast of the same achievement.

But not being in need was not the main reason for which Emmet had no dreams of grandeur despite his lineage. What truly made him feel he did not need to be anything special to anyone was the fact that, in a very peculiar way, he already was. Indeed, Emmet Von Batchky happened to possess a magical moustache.

On the day of his birth, the midwife was quite taken aback when she handed him to his mother, for what he lacked in hair on his head - as is quite usual for newborns -, he more than made up for on his upper lip - which was, on the other hand, quite unheard of.

His parents had tried shaving the unseemly facial hair, but to no avail. No razor blade, neither pair of scissors, nor depilatory cream would do. The child remained, despite his age and their best efforts, equipped with two flamboyant strands of brown hair above his mouth.

Of course, he was teased mercilessly growing up, and despite being strong-willed enough to handle it gracefully, he most welcomed the age at which other boys despaired at seeing the lower part of their face still smooth as a child's. As an adult, Emmet genuinely enjoyed finally being able to blend into a crowd. His moustache was most majestic, of course, but now no longer as out of place as it had been in the past.

Emmet fell in love with the first woman brave enough to tell him "I moustache you a question" as an opening line. They were happily married, and had beautiful children who were, luckily, unaffected by his oddity or any other of the sort. He remained moustached even as his hairline started to recede and up until he was altogether fully bald. His glorious facial hair never greyed or thinned. And as he was buried, his children and grand-children speculated that, maybe, one day, an archaeologist would be baffled at their find of a human skull with a mysteriously unmovable moustache attached to it.